Revolutionary Teacher Onizuka
by GlenCheshire
Summary: Catastrophe! The male faculty of Ohtori Academy are on strike! What is Acting Chairman of the Board, Ohtori Akio, going to do? His answer comes to him during a daylight grocery store robbery in the form of Eikichi Onizuka, age 22.
1. Salary Strikes and The Supermarket Savio...

Disclaimer: GTO(Great Teacher Onizuka) is written by Fujisawa Tooru and published by KC Magazine Shounen Comics. "Shoujo Kakumei Utena" and it's American Version, "Revolutionary Girl Utena" are copywrited by Be-PaPas, Chiho Saito / Shogakukan, Shokaku Iinkai, TV Tokyo and Central Park Media. (Hope this is everyone)  
  
Author's note: Normally when I write I like to stay as inside the story- line as much as possible when applicable. This may not be the case, however, for this story. Hope no one minds a bit if I take a couple of liberties and change a few things by the end. Remember, continuity- retentive people, this is merely a cross over done by a fan of both series.  
  
  
  
Revolutionary Teacher Onizuka  
  
  
  
  
  
Ch. 1: Salary Strikes and The Supermarket Savior  
  
"Damn them," Akio Ohtori muttered under his breath as he stood in line behind a shopping cart with his sister, Anthy, "Damn them to the deepest pits of blackest hell."  
  
His cursing was a current result of an earlier altercation in his office that morning when several male teachers had stormed straight in unannounced.  
  
"We have had enough!", Mr. Aikawa, the head P.E. teacher (and what could be considered the leader of that current pack of angry men), bellowed, "Not only are we, the male teachers of the Ohtori Academy being paid about 30% less than that of the female staff, but I also hear they are getting a separate SPA wing added to their dormitory!"  
  
Akio had tried to diffuse the situation with tact, "Gentlemen, please, I'm sure we can come to a resolution that will be satisfactory-"  
  
"The only thing that will be satisfactory to us is equal treatment, Mr. Vice-chairman. Nothing more, nothing less."  
  
Akio sighed, "I'm very sorry about this, but the female staff put in a requisition for this add-on several months ago. It was within the school's budget at the time and you are certainly able to put in a requisition of your own, but I'm afraid that the board isn't meeting until next quarter."  
  
Mr. Aikawa straightened up with a hate-filled scowl on his face, "Humph, so this is the way you want to play it, eh? FINE!!" He turned to the rabble behind him, "We are going on strike until equal treatment is in our grasp!!" This announcement was met with cheers and, deaf to Akio's pleas to hear him out, they left his office chanting the word "Strike!" over and over again.  
  
Later that afternoon, his sister had arrived, smiling vacantly as usual. He had told her what had transpired and she responded with the suggestion that they go into Hou'oh (the town of which the academy was located outside of) and grab some groceries for dinner that evening.  
  
"Perhaps the trip will give you some time to think of a solution." She had said to him.  
  
Now there they were, stuck in a long line with cart full of groceries while Akio continued to fume over the day's events with no foreseeable answers in sight. Before they had left for town, he already was hearing rumors of the school closing down. "This whole situation is rapidly getting out of my control."  
  
Anthy smiled and offered him a grape out of the pack they had bagged, "Cheer up, dear brother, things can always be worse."  
  
Akio took the grape and popped it into his mouth, chewed, swallowed and smiled back to his other half, "Sister, I cannot possibly see how this day could possibly get any worse."  
  
"EVERYONE, ON THE GROUND, THIS IS A HOLD-UP!!" This statement was being loudly broadcast from a brutish male figure with an oily looking duck's-ass haircut, wearing a leather jacket and blue jeans and a lip-ring. He had a partner wearing pretty much the same thing; only his nose looked like someone had worked it over with a tire-iron till it was bent sideways. They were both armed with what appeared to be .45's.  
  
"Of course." Akio said matter-of-factly as he and Anthy dropped to the ground as the young robber directed.  
  
After they took all the cash out of the registers, Lip-ring went around and began gathering up all the wallets of the people in line. When he got to Akio, the chairman just showed his empty pockets.  
  
"I'm sorry, but everything I get here is on an outside account with the store."  
  
Lip-ring scowled in much the same way as Mr. Aikawa, "Oh really, is that so,", he looked at Anthy, "Then we'll just have to take other forms of payment."  
  
He yanked the poor Rose Bride to her feet and stuck a gun to her head. Akio called out her name and tried to get up to save his sister only to be pistol-whipped back down to the ground. Lip-ring laughed and called out to Mush-nose, "HEY, we got a guy with no cash here. I say we take his girl here for some fun, what do you say?"  
  
Mush-nose grinned, "Of course, I was wondering what we could do for fun tonight, looks like the fun came to- ARGH!!"  
  
His comment was cut short as some object came whistling out of the blue like a missile and crushed his hand that was brandishing his firearm. Both the gun and the object landed to the ground, the object in question was a can of tomato soup. Both Mush-nose and Lip-ring looked at the apparent direction the can was thrown to see who would dare do that.  
  
At first glance, everyone was on the floor. Then they saw someone there, at the back of the line, standing. He was dressed in faded overalls, no shoes, no shirt, just a bandana and a cigarette hanging off his lip. His hair was short and dyed blonde. He was also carrying a large hand-basket of canned goods.  
  
"Oi, you think you can move this along? I want to eat dinner sometime today!" he said to the two now bewildered robbers.  
  
"What are you, some kind of idiot?" Lip-ring yelled out as he brandished his weapon in the air whilst holding on to poor Anthy, who was just sort of standing there with a sad look on her face. "We have guns and we can fucking KILL you with them if you don't do what we say, or perhaps," He put the gun back to Anthy's head, "This little lady could get hurt." He emphasized the point by licking the side of her face. She shuddered in revulsion but did not struggle.  
  
Akio's eyes widened, he couldn't let Anthy come to harm. She was too integral to his plans to get killed yet. He saw his chance to act, Lip- ring was busy mouthing off to the fellow in the back and Mush-nose was busy holding his now broken hand in pain. Akio lashed out with his foot from the ground, belting Lip-ring right in the back of the knee, causing it to buckle. Lip-ring screamed as his arms instinctively flailed out for purchase, releasing Anthy, who dropped to the ground like a sack of bricks.  
  
Just then, the man in the back whipped out a second can, and knocked the gun this time out of Lip-ring's hand.  
  
"Now,", the blonde man said in a casual tone while cracking his knuckles, "who will win in this fight? A pair of inept thieves who can't even hold onto their guns for five minutes, or the idiot with a second dan in karate?" For a moment Akio saw his younger days in the blonde man's eyes.  
  
Mush-nose began to sweat as he let go of his pained hand. "W-We can take this moron, he's just one guy!" With that he whipped out a knife from his pants and lunged at his opponent, the other man quickly following suit.  
  
The man laughed quietly under his breath, "And you even forgot about the money too." he said to himself as they got closer and closer.  
  
When they were about 5 feet away he dropped his cans, let out a Bruce Lee- like howl, jumped and swung his foot around for a powerful roundhouse blow to both their empty heads, knocking them clear across the aisles. Mush- nose landed ass-up on the belt of an empty register counter. Lip-ring wasn't so lucky; he went crashing right through a store display and smashed head first into a vending machine, slapping into the glass with a sickening crunch and spider-web-like cracks appeared around his face where it made contact.  
  
There was a moment of silence in the store as everyone began to realize that the robbers were out of commission, all by that one man. Then Akio began clapping politely, Anthy got up and joined him, smiling all the while. Soon the whole store began applauding him, slowly at first then rising in volume. The police sirens were barely heard over the din as the man just stood there looking kind of embarrassed at all the fanfare.  
  
After all the statements were read, people arrested and groceries paid for, Akio caught up with the blonde fellow in the parking lot of the store.  
  
He placed a hand on his shoulder, "Sir, I'd like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for rescuing my sister and saving us from those brutal fellows."  
  
The man turned around and gave a friendly smile, "Oh it was nothing, idiots like that should just stick to being general pests rather than going for things like that. Besides, I'd have probably not been able to do anything if you hadn't helped out like that."  
  
"I'd like to thank you personally, how about if you come for dinner tonight? My small way of saying 'thank you'. by the way, we've not been formally introduced, I am Ohtori Akio," he gestured to his sister, "this is my sister, Himemya Anthy."  
  
Anthy bowed, "A pleasure to meet you."  
  
The man nodded and bowed in turn, "I am Eikichi Onizuka, age 22, currently unemployed teacher."  
  
Akio's eyes widened in shock, "A teacher, you say?" This was too good to be true; this "Onizuka" could be the answer to his problem.  
  
Onizuka ran a hand through his hair and blushed a bit, "Heh, well, there's a story behind that."  
  
He led Onizuka to his car and said, "Come with me and explain it on the way, I believe that I can help you in more ways than just dinner."  
  
And so Akio, Anthy and Onizuka sped off to Ohtori Acadamy. Did the standing chairman of the board find a lucky break in Mr. Onizuka or did he just make the biggest mistake of his life? Find out in the next chapter: "The School of Lesbians and Total Vehicular Destruction!" 


	2. Rose Petal Jam and a Naked Surprise

Author's note: Yes, yes, I said the second one would have the lesbians and such, but I found too much content was to be had in between. I don't think I'll be doing too much with the Japanese honorifics since I'm none too well versed with their usual uses. Hope that doesn't detract from any enjoyment you may have while reading this.  
  
Ch 2. Rose Petal Jam and a Naked Surprise.  
  
"Ahhhhh, this is true luxury!" Onizuka yelled out as he spread out on the back seat of Akio's convertible. Akio, Anthy and Onizuka were speeding along a lone road out in the Japanese countryside, though in no uncertain terms was any Japanese countryside ever too much 'country'. Billboards and the occasional sparse dottings of smaller, private residences peppered the landscape as they sped by. "This is truly a high class vehicle, for a chairman of a private school you sure live it up!"  
  
Akio laughed as the wind whipped his hair out a sent his pony tail flying like the end of a kite, "I'm glad you approve, we're coming up to the academy that I told you about in just a moment."  
  
Anthy just sat in the front passenger side, holding two large sized bags of groceries in her lap and one at her feet, "It will be good to get back after today." she said demurely while her face never stole away from that vacantly happy expression.  
  
"What a strange girl", Onizuka thought to himself, "truly strange and even a little unnerving with that smile of hers." He decided to further question Akio, "So, let me get all of what you said straight: You're the acting chairman of this. Omake Academy?"  
  
"It's Ohtori, and yes, I am."  
  
"Ah, sorry. so what was this problem you talked about?"  
  
"Most of the male teaching staff have gone on strike because of. certain misunderstandings. that were brought about by poor communication."  
  
"And you need only a male teacher like myself, why?"  
  
"Well, to be quite frank I have two reasons: one is to boost school morale as much as possible, we can't let all the students think that this is going to either disrupt or even cease their learning at- Ah, there it is now." He said as Ohtori's outline swam over the horizon as they climbed a hill. It was lit up in the noonday sun, making the white walls on its classical buildings shine as if the entire campus itself were some sort of fairy-tale castle. One building caught Onizuka's eye in particular; the massive central tower that jutted out of the center of the campus looking, if anything, like the old Chinese legend of the pillar that connected heaven and earth.  
  
Onizuka was awestruck; "I've never seen a campus quite so nice as this!"  
  
Akio's pleasant smile, only seen by Anthy at the moment, likened momentarily to a shark's as they drove through the front gate, "Welcome to my Rose Academy, Onizuka."  
  
The meal that night was sumptuous, including many delicacies such as fatty tuna sashimi organized into rosebud arrangements, bread smothered in Anthy's special rose petal jam and a small array of fine cheeses made from the milk of Anthy's personal pet cow.  
  
Onizuka ate with fervor and conversation was lighthearted and full of laughter between he and Akio. Anthy, of course, just ate and smiled, answering only when asked. Strangely enough, whenever the topic of how old they were or how long either was at the academy, both Anthy and Akio would change the subject. Onizuka didn't notice nor did he really care, if they wanted to keep secrets, let 'em.  
  
Near the end of the meal, the now near satiated Onizuka asked (through full mouth), "Oh, Akio, what was-" he paused as he swallowed his mouthful, "What was that second reason you had to hire me?"  
  
Akio chewed on a piece of jam-covered bread thoughtfully, when the question came to light he paused, swallowed, and said, "My second reason, put simply, is that you are my main psychological bargaining chip, Mr. Onizuka. If the male faculty thought I would hire others to replace them, making their strike a moot point, it would give me a bit of an edge to resolve all of this faster." He then leaned in closer to the blonde haired teacher and smiled, giving one the impression that he was about to be let in on some great conspiracy, "Now I have a question for you, Mr. Onizuka, you said before that your current state of being has a story behind it. Why don't you tell me about it?"  
  
Across the table, Onizuka nodded, "Ok, I'll tell you straight from the beginning, you see it all started.." He then began to account of his time spent as the leader of his infamous karate club in high school, being in motorcycle gangs and the like. He talked of the first time he wanted to be a teacher (trying to leave out that he did it to meet schoolgirls), his first success with his training class (also leaving out the fact that they tried to blackmail him and he dunked several of them in pond water for it). He then went on to discuss how he came to teach at the Holy Forest Academy and a few of his tamer adventures, and of how he got put on a temporary leave of absence.  
  
"So I was getting up that morning, thinking I was still in my room near the roof and I was pretty groggy from that night of drinking and didn't quite see where I was when I took off my pants to use the toilet. When I realized where I was, there was already screaming going on. I was in the classroom, it was 11am and yet another of those parent watchdog groups was sitting in the back of the class." He paused to take a sip of the tea Anthy had served up in the interim: Orange Pekoe with, of course, a bit of rose petal. "Well, needless to say, things got ugly really fast and the Chairwoman was nearly forced to fire me on the spot. Instead I was put on a temporary unpaid leave of absence until it all blew over, she even gave me the temporary use of a summer apartment she has in Hou'oh so that I could have a place to stay until I could come back."  
  
Akio sipped his tea thoughtfully with a bemused grin on his face and his eyes staring directly at the man across from him, "An amusing story, Mr. Onizuka, you are no doubt a man blessed by the stars themselves. There's no worry about where to stay here, I assure you, we have fully functional dormitories for everyone. In fact." he grabbed a pen and paper from a nearby countertop and scribbled a few things onto it, handing it to Anthy who then handed it to Onizuka. "Here are the directions to where your room is, just give me the location and the key of that apartment you mentioned and I will have someone get your things." After dinner, Onizuka thanked his new employer profusely and promptly headed off to where he would be staying.  
  
The building was big and formidable; it also seemed to be very dark and lonely. Onizuka shrugged, there were certainly worse places that this that he had to crash in. For all intents and purposes, the entire building looked deserted aside from him. He found his room quickly enough, right where Akio said it would be; it even had his name embossed on a plaque nailed to his door. Things certainly worked fast around here.  
  
When he opened the door, a look of total astonishment washed over him. The room looked almost like a fancy hotel's would. It had everything from massive closet space and a spacious double bed to what appeared to be a totally functional kitchen nook. On said nook's counter was a small note that read:  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Mr. Onizuka,  
  
I trust that the accommodations are satisfactory and that you are adjusting well. Your things should be arriving in the morning; there is a communal bath at the end of the hall. I believe that things will definitely be livelier with you around.  
  
Live up to my expectations,  
  
Ohtori Akio  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
On a rack in the closet was a set of towels, soaps, caps and a back- scrubber.  
  
"My god, this really IS like a hotel!" he said quietly to himself. "Well, since it seems like I'm the only one here." he took a moment to sniff his underarms, recoiling at the fetid stench of his day's unwashed trials and tribulations, "PHEW! I think it's time to get cleaned up." Feeling much like a kid who had the house to himself while the parents were away, he decided to simply doff his duds, grabbed a towel and scrubber and (in his birthday suit, mind you) ambled on down the hall to the door marked "bath".  
  
"Ahhh, I've had such a good run of luck today, I find a new job until I get right with the media. again. I get a spacious room for just being here and I get a bath all to-", he was cut short when he went to reach for the door knob and it turned just as his hand reached out. When the door opened, Onizuka's eyes nearly fell out of his head with shock, a nude girl with long, pink hair came almost stumbling out of the bath, feeling the walls like a blind person. Her eyes were covered in soap and were shut tight.  
  
"Crap, Anthy, is that you? I can't find the extra towel and I can't see, can you help me?" she asked, nearly bumping into him as he backed off, nervous as all hell. He could hardly think and could only edge back, avoiding flailing, soapy arms as this very wet and very naked female student (he assumed by the look of her) was blindly advancing on him. He had to think fast or it was possible he'd be staring down the barrel of a sexual harassment suit the moment he got here. Especially since that, the sight of this naked girl was arousing very male parts of him that he had no say in controlling. Being caught like that by anyone at this point would mark the fastest-ending teaching job in Japan's history.  
  
"Damn it, Anthy, why aren't you helping, at least say something!!"  
  
Acting purely on instinct, he handed her the towel he had as she nearly fell on him and beat hell for leather back to his room, slamming the door and locking it behind him. He was sitting naked on the floor and panting, praying to whatever gods resided in the afterworld that no one had seen him. For a moment he thought he heard her yelp as he ran but, since he didn't hear her scream the word "pervert", he didn't check.  
  
Just seconds after he had safely made his escape, he heard footsteps pad down the hall, and a familiar voice call out, "Utena, what was wrong? Oh, you're naked, let me cover you up."  
  
He heard the girl answer in reply, "N-No! Anthy, get your hands off of there! And what do you mean 'what was wrong'? You helped me, and what was that that you were carrying that smacked my side? Felt like a big piece of pipe or something. Better yet, I don't think I want to know, let's just go back inside."  
  
"Yes, Miss Utena."  
  
Two sets of feet padded down the hall and he heard a door slam. He let out a breath he didn't know he had held in. "My GOD." He whispered out loud, "I thought I'd had it this time. My good fortune hasn't run out yet it seems." Be that as it may, he decided that tonight was going to be a night he bathed in the sink.. Two thoughts were on his mind as he finally went to bed. Was that Anthy in the hall the same Anthy that was Akio's sister? The other was that he didn't have even one snapshot of that pink haired girl.  
  
Will Onizuka adjust well to his new surroundings? How the hell is Utena going to explain the shaft-like bruise on her abdomen? And what is Akio's connection to the Vice Principal of Holy Forest Academy? Find out two of these answers next time (Really, I promise) in Chapter three: The School of Lesbians and Total Vehicular Destruction!! 


End file.
